


Like You

by Jenshih_Blue



Series: Open the Door ~ A Modern Day Fairy Tale in 13 Parts [8]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, M/M, Season/Series 01, Season/Series 02, Season/Series 03, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-26
Updated: 2017-03-26
Packaged: 2018-10-10 17:52:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10443642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jenshih_Blue/pseuds/Jenshih_Blue





	

Sam couldn’t imagine what it’d been like for Dean, although he’d desperately tried. Dean didn’t talk about it and neither did he by proxy. If he had, Dean would have possibly spontaneously combusted on the spot.So that one moment remained the one thing that remained unspoken between them. There were times the memories of that time tickled the edges of his subconscious, but they remained vague and elusive at best. For the most part, they remained the faint echo of a dream that haunted the dark spots in his mind.

That first day they’d spent wrapped around one another, bare legs and arms tangled, sure that any moment that the sky would open, raining blood and fire, and that the world as they had known it would come to an end at last. As the sun lowered in the west, the soft colors of twilight settling across the landscape Sam woke to the sound of a wounded animal or so he believed.Blinking away the final silken strands of sleep from his eyes, he glanced across the space that separated him from his brother and his eyes widened.

Curled in a fetal position beneath the twisted blankets, Dean faced him, his fists clenched, and pressed against his heaving chest. What shocked Sam most though was the expression on his sleeping face. His eyebrows had drawn together in an attempt to stave off the tears that Sam could clearly see sparkling in his dark lashes. Dean wasn’t one to cry, never had been, and Sam could count the times he’d seen him do so openly on one hand over the course of their lives. The last time had been nearly a year ago on the side of some lonely road at sunrise somewhere between Lawrence and nowhere. He should have known then that Dean was scared of something so deeply that he would have used any excuse to distract Sam from the truth up to and including their father’s deal with that yellow-eyed bastard to say that he wasn’t supposed to be here.

Dean had tried his damnedest to keep Sam at arm’s length. Of course, it hadn’t worked and that just led Sam to believe that the secret Dean had carried had become far too heavy for him to bear alone. He’d always seemed so much stronger than anyone else even their father, but to Sam’s horror, he’d discovered that Dean had never truly recovered from their mother’s death. Somewhere trapped inside the man he’d always thought was his hero was a terrified child who’d had his life consumed in a ball of fire and brimstone, a child that had lost something so precious as to outshine a perfect jewel.

Carefully, Sam moved closer, his eyes never leaving Dean’s anguished face as he lifted one hand, his fingertips ghosting through the silk of his brother’s hair.Even that faint touch caused Dean to flinch and pull away. Sometimes he wondered what else John had told Dean in that hospital room. He’d never know though because some secrets Dean held closer than other ones and that was okay. Sam had his own secrets.

“Sam…”

The pain in Dean’s whisper drew Sam from his troubled thoughts and he leaned in closer. He was so close he could feel the warmth of Dean’s breath, see the tears as they hung precariously on the dark web of his lashes before they released their grip and tumbled down his sleep-flushed cheeks. 

“Sammy, no…”

“It’s okay, Dean,” he whispered, “I’m here, man.”

Dean shifted in his sleep and took a ragged breath, “Couldn’t protect you…messed it all up. Why’d you leave me?”

It dawned on Sam that Dean was reliving the night that he’d watched him die at the hands of Jake and his throat tightened. Tears welled in his eyes as he thought of that night, the way the sound of Dean’s voice had lifted a weight off his heart, and then the pain had come followed by darkness. All he wanted was Dean to open up to let him know why he’d chose to sacrifice his soul to pull him back into the land of the living. No matter what Dean had said, at least he’d still been alive when their father had made his deal. They’d still held onto hope, but Sam knew that he’d been dead. He still bore the scar on his spine as a painful reminder of the bitter truth.

What Dean had done was unnatural. Hell, he’d even said it himself ‘What’s dead should stay dead’, but apparently, the rule didn’t apply when it came to Sam. He closed his eyes, the warmth of his tears scalding his cold skin. He swiped furiously at his cheeks as Dean whimpered and the words that slipped past his lips caused the air to catch in Sam’s throat again.

“I’ll come for you, Sammy.”

Eyes drifting open Sam focused on his face and once more, he found himself reminded of how beautiful his brother was scars and all. He could see the earnest four-year-old child Dean had been. There was an innocence that shone in his face when he slept, one that he hid far too well in his waking hours. That innocence also reminded Sam of how much they’d lost and it was almost more than his heart could contain. 

“Nothin’ love can’t undo,” Dean whispered, “Momma said so.” His last words were nearly inaudible as he sighed and his body relaxed.

Sam pulled Dean into his arms and for once, he came willingly although Sam knew it was only because he was sleeping. Dean would have given him shit had he been awake and now Sam knew why. He held Dean close to his chest, his breath warm and moist against his bare skin, and body relaxing in the circle of Sam’s arms. They both lay there like that for a while and then Sam pressed a kiss to the top of Dean’s head, the hair tickling his lips.

“Mom was right, Dean,” Sam sighed as tears continued to trail silently down his face, “I’m not going to grieve for you, there’s room inside that grave for two.”


End file.
